End game: Russia

Ah Russia, sweet Russia! Still firing them howitzers in the golden-fielded West. Still ignoring the declamations of the rulers of the West! How could they?

Russia has three stages to master. The first two stages were the preparation for a Ukraine assault and the actual warfare. The third, and end-game stage, is getting friendly with the West again.

The great weakness of Western Civilization is it just wants to be friends with everybody. Like a dog sniffing its nose in the air suspiciously, it gets turned off when a political Power takes actions which indicate Unfriendliness.

Thus Russia is best off making severe gestures of friendliness to the West once it tears a limb off the beating-heart body of Ukraine. It should say, hey, I like you. I always liked you. Can’t we be friends? Then it should un-delete all the people it banned from its country so they can visit (like the Mayors of Toronto and Montreal and the premiers of Canada) again, and welcome them with a special good time with vodka included.

Since almost all men like pussy, Putin should attempt to bribe politicians having dowdy wives with young ass who can charm them silly. Just keep this on the down low. The Nordstream 2 project should be fast-tracked. Putin should hand wave away the restrictions and trade embargoes levied against his country and announce he “understands” it. He should be magnanimous, in other words.

There has always been a strain of man who wants to unify all the white people of the world, East and West. This man will swoon if Putin pretends to go along a bit with their program. Nobody is independent like a Russian, and their inconsequential declination in favor of going along will be viewed with beaming approval by Washington.

It is Washington to which Putin must aim the primary cannons of friendliness. Europe does nothing without America’s approval. President Biden’s handlers will nod Biden’s head and whisper “smile” in his ear and Russia and America, two great powers, will no longer be at opposite ends of poles but will be rubbing hips like Mentally Telepathic siamese twins.

14 thoughts on “End game: Russia

  1. Heh-heh. Funny post. Probably fairly close to reality, also. But perhaps it’s better things end this way, than in our annihilation from nuclear missiles.

    1. *hand over forehead* Jeez, you mentioned THE NUKES, the dreaded nukes. This was supposed to be a pointer. Putin’s supposed to log on to the internet, find my site, and take a breather or two, realizing he can win it all without resorting to … THE NUKES. Still, it makes for a dramatic film ending.

        1. It would star an unknown Catxman and a less unknown Tippy Gnu. The two square-jawed heroes would face off against Russian spetsnaz units sent to kill them. In the end, Catxman would clobber a Russian climbing in through the window with a keyboard.

  2. I like the ‘primary canons of friendliness’; it would be a good thing if this ugly war could be over; we will have to see how this war ‘pans out’ —

    1. Repair bills do not come with the adventure. When you go to Universal Park Ukraine all the tanks are real and the pterodactyls are machine-made — it is a combination made in heaven.

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